Thursday, November 8, 2007

Watch your kids - especially at church

This is just a little rant, I hope nobody takes it personally.

Although we certainly do not have a problem with this at all at our church - thanks to Pastor Anderson's preaching style - freaks and weirdos are attracted to churches like moths are to the light. After all, you should be nice to people at church, which to a lot of people is synonymous to trusting them, i.e. entrusting them with your children. People who would take advantage of children know that all too well, and come in as wolves in sheep's clothing. This is why our church does not have any ministries or programs where children are separated from their parents. That means no Sunday school, no nurseries, no children's church, Christian school, etc. Children are expected to sit in church quietly with their family, listening to the preaching, and learning. This used to be the norm until the 20th century. We do provide a room for Moms to step out with their infants if they need to, where they can still see and hear without being heard. But the goal is to train kids at a young age to be in church. All three of our older children have made this transition fully by their 1st birthday, and even before that I have rarely had to step out with them.

Why am I saying all of this? Because some unknown freak has been harassing us since the church first started less than 2 years ago. He calls one of our private numbers which is neither published anywhere nor ever given out, and he always asks the same question: "Hello, what time are your Sunday services?" The first time he called I gave him the info, and then answered some more of his questions, and when I got off the phone I thought "I hope this guy never shows up!" His voice sounded like that of a serial killer in a movie I saw long before I got saved - real quiet and creepy. He never did show up, but would call every few weeks, each time with the same question and each time telling me they had just moved into the area a couple of weeks ago. He would ask about children in our church, and other detailed questions about their lives, their names and ages, and how their parents raised them. He would always end the call by assuring me "I'll see you on Sunday!" Of course, I never did give this guy any of the information he was trying to get about the children in our church. The third or fourth time he called I started to just dish the guy off with a quick answer about the service time, and then asking: "Haven't you called before?", in response to which he would quickly hang up. Needless to say, his calls were private calls and his number withheld. After a few of those calls I finally told him he had the wrong number and hung up on him, since he is actually calling my husband's business number, not the church. Well, he called again today and asked his same question about the Sunday services in the same creepy way, to which I replied "Don't you ever dare call again, you freaking pervert!" and hung up.

There, you have it. I am not loving, and I am judgmental. Worse yet, if the guy ever does show up I will have a couple of our men remove him from the premises immediately. And if he shows up at YOUR church, you should do the same.

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

This is funny

I found this list of funny British laws in a news article.

1. It is illegal to die in the Houses of Parliament.

2. It is an act of treason to place a postage stamp bearing the British monarch upside-down.

3. In Liverpool, it is illegal for a woman to be topless except as a clerk in a tropical fish store.

4. Mince pies cannot be eaten on Christmas Day.

5. In Scotland, if someone knocks on your door and requires the use of your toilet, you must let them enter.

6. A pregnant woman can legally relieve herself anywhere she wants, including in a policeman's helmet.

7. The head of any dead whale found on the British coast automatically becomes the property of the king, and the tail of the queen.

8. It is illegal to avoid telling the tax man anything you do not want him to know, but legal not to tell him information you do not mind him knowing.

9. It is illegal to enter the Houses of Parliament in a suit of armour.

10. In the city of York it is legal to murder a Scotsman within the ancient city walls, but only if he is carrying a bow and arrow.